Healing
"The removal of unwanted feelings is depicted as a word called healing. To heal in truth is to understand, accept, and surrender."-Ashmita Arora
Often portrayed as the process of eliminating pain, curing wounds, or overcoming the darker parts of ourselves. But this depiction is a distortion of what healing truly is. To heal is not to remove,fix or get rid of anything; it is not about banishing discomfort or silencing the parts of ourselves we find unworthy. True healing at its core is far more profound, more nuanced, more raw. It’s about understanding, accepting, and ultimately surrendering to the totality of our experience. Integration, not elimination.
What we often call “unwanted feelings” the pain, the sorrow, the fear, are not enemies to be defeated or erased. They are messengers. Guiding us toward the parts of ourselves that are asking to be seen, understood, and integrated. Yet, in modern society, we are taught to reject these emotions, to fix them, to label them as wrong or bad. We are conditioned to believe that healing means their removal, that to be healed is to be free of discomfort. But in this pursuit of a sterile, emotionless version of healing, we rob ourselves of the truth that these feelings are not here to be removed. They are here to be embraced.
To heal, in its truest sense, is to understand. By understanding, I don’t mean intellectually dissecting your emotions. Forgo the rationalization of why you feel pain or fear and dive into the heart of these feelings, seeing them for what they truly are. Pain is not an intruder in your life; it’s a teacher. It’s the language through which your soul communicates its deepest needs. Shift your perspective from viewing pain as something to be avoided to something to be understood, and unlock the first key to healing.
Let me ask you this, could you allow it to exist without judgment? Befriending the discomfort, anger, grief, and asking, "What are you here to teach me?" Emotions are not random or meaningless they are intimately tied to your growth, to your evolution. Every unwanted feeling carries within it the seed of your liberation, but only if you’re willing to listen. Healing, therefore, begins not with the removal of these feelings, but with the permission to invite them in and understand them fully.
Yet, understanding alone is not enough. To truly heal, you must also accept. Acceptance is one of the hardest, most transformative aspects of the healing process because it requires you to let go of control. It requires you to stop fighting, to stop trying to change or fix your emotions, rather allow them to be. Acceptance means acknowledging that these feelings, no matter how uncomfortable, are part of your path. They are here for a reason, that they are part of your life, and that in rejecting them, you are only rejecting a part of yourself.
Acceptance is not resignation. It’s about acknowledging that the pain you feel is part of the human condition, part of the richness of life. There is no growth without discomfort. Acceptance is the willingness to hold all of it, the pain and the joy, the fear and the love, without trying to change it, without trying to make it something it’s not.
Surrender is the ultimate act of trust. It’s the moment when you stop trying to heal in the way the world has taught you. It’s the recognition that healing is not something you do; it’s something that happens through you when you are open, when you are willing to allow everything to be as it is. Surrender is about relinquishing the need to control the narrative of your life and trusting that even in the most painful moments, you are exactly where you need to be.
Healing, then, is not a process of removal. It is about integration. It’s about learning to hold all the parts of yourself with compassion. The parts of you that feel broken are not placements of weakness that need to be discarded rather the very places where your light can shine the brightest. They are signs of your capacity to grow. Understand the roles they play in your life; accept them as part of your path, and surrender to the process that will, in time, transform into wisdom.
